Staniel McFineAss

I can't come tonight /cry I work at 9 and just woke up after my second 4 hour sleep of the day. If you guys are still partying at 5am when i get off work let me know otherwise im going to have to break in and sneak into your bed at 5:30 when I get there.

Yes cole you can come too, infact if you arent in there i'll truely be dissapointed.

And Chris you can come too if you promise not to bite, as hard.

And wow I feel dirty now, time for a shower, food and "Work".

Becca got your email thanks for the fast responce, will reply tomorrow sometime.

Dez, I realized Im getting about 8 hours of sleep a day, 2 sets of 4 hours at random times, sometimes its 5 and 3 or 3 and 5 but in the end it adds up right?

Fuck late nights

I'm really starting to hate working nights. Or more specifically I hate working more than 2 in a row...

I have too much time to think on latenights, and for me thinking is never a good thing. I end up feeling angry, bitter, sad, used, jealous, alone, really fucking pissed off... although I think angry cover's that...

but yea im finally done my 5 day late night stint, now I get pretty much 7 days off before I have to work nights again. thank god. I hate what nights do to me.

But there is hope, of a sort. I have started playing World of Warcraft again so at least I can shut off those feelings for a while and drown myself in computer games WOOT!

and no Dez and Jen you don't have to be worried. I used to drown myself in computer games all the time before I met you. It's what I know how to do.


Also, cole I got your message but I was at work, my phone isn't reliable anymore (It barely works and if it does it's pretty much a guarentee that it will stop working very soon) so I'll try to call you soon, or just come over, my house has carpet again so i may have a "Phil has carpet again" party consisting of video games, and good movies that boys actually want to watch.. like "Dragon: the bruce lee story" <--- my favorite movie of all time. (I just realized last night while watching it at work getting paid $12 something an hour to do it.) anyway time to drown out all this anger by killing shit over and over and over AND FUCKING OVER! yeay! http://www.blizzard.com/inblizz/fanart/ScreenShot.aspx?ImageIndex=416&Set=0

this pic makes me happy, I wonder why...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r5X8p9W4VkM&mode=related&search
Current Favorite Song... altough this verson has been cut by about 2 minutes. :(

Forsaken by Destiny
Forsaken by my Own Mind
I Must Remove my Skin
To See Belief in Your EYES!!

My job > You

I love my job.

$12.something an hour

I watch a movie for the first 2 hours

Then I play ps2 for 4 hours.

Then I do my dockwalk (write down all the pro numbers and where each piece of freight is going)

Then I play more ps2 until home time.

I also call in ever hour or so so they know im alive.


My job > you

BAHAHA I'll show you depressing

So you think Stabilo - Flawed Design is depressing???

I"LL SHOW YOU!!!!


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h6jOMn_KPCU


By the way WTF HAPPENED TO THE CHAMPANE BOTTLE!?!?

Stabilo - Flawed Design, Naruto Music Video

It's a bunch of Naruto video clips done to Stabilo's Flawed Design.

the reason im posting this is because this sone is kinda how I am in some ways, and trying to change those ways is turning out to be very difficult. Let me know what you think.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wer_rLswX4M


Lyrics:



When I was a young boy
I was honest and I had more self-control
If I was tempted I would run
Then, when I got older
I began to lie to get exactly what I wanted
When I wanted it
- And I wanted it
Now, I'm having trouble differentiating
Between what I want
And what I need
To make me happy
So instead of thinking I just stop
Before I have the chance to contemplate the
Consequences of action

Bridge:
And I will turn off
And I will shut down
Burying the voices of my conscience hitting ground
And I will turn off
And I will shut down
The chemicals are restless in my head

Chorus:
'Cuz I lie
Not because I want to
But I seem to need to
All the time
Yeah, I lie
And I don't even know it
Maybe this is
All a part of my flawed design

And ever since I figured out
That I could control other people
I've had trouble sleeping
With both eyes closed
And if I asked permission
If I make sure it's ok
I promise I won't slip up this time
You can trust me
But never take advice from someone
Who just admitted to being devious
Who just confessed to treason
And I would ask
That you never ask a question
That I cannot ask myself
For it might
Dirty up your conscience

Chorus:
'Cuz I lie
Not because I want to
But I seem to need to
All the time
Yeah, I lie
And I don't even know it
Maybe this is
All a part of my -

And how can you say those things
Why can't you just believe?
And how can you say those things
And keep a straight face?
And how can you say those things
Why can't you just believe?
And how can you say those things
And keep a straight face?

Bridge [x2]
'Cuz I lie
Not because I want to
But I seem to need to
All the time
Yeah, I lie
And I don't even know it
Maybe this is
All a part of my -
'Cuz I lie
And if I could control it
Maybe I could leave it all behind
Yeah, I lie
And I don't even know it
Maybe this is all a part of my
Flawed design